Finster Finds

In the summer of 2005 we moved to Edmonton. I will be honest about this. I was very apprehensive about the idea of moving. I was very worried about leaving behind my theatre life in Fort McMurray. I had written my first play and was excited about that and where I could go with that. I knew Edmonton was a great theatre town, but I didn't know what it would be like for me, a non-professional. Would I find avenues for the theatre I needed to do? Boy, did I ever! It started with Fiddler on the Roof , an ELOPE show. I still have many good friends from this cast and this is the show that led me to Walterdale. Although the rehearsal process for the show often seemed disorganized and chaotic, it was fun and I reconnected with Brian Bast and met Elizabeth and Jackie and Judy. The show went up in February of 2006 and from there I auditioned for the 2006 One Acts at Walterdale ( Lunatic ) and suddenly felt at home. I knew from that first show at Walterdale that I had found a place f...

Just when you think you have the parenting thing somewhat figured out, you have a second child and all the tricks that worked with the first one do not work for the second. Gibson was a real surprise for me. For one thing, I really thought he was going to be a girl - the pregnancy was totally different than my first. I also successfully had a VBAC so I could drive the day after coming home and my body didn't feel like I had been in a car accident. I knew how to nurse. I wasn't afraid of him dying if I left him alone in his room while he slept. I was way more relaxed. BUT I didn't instantly *get* him like I did with Oliver. It took me awhile. Oliver liked to rock to sleep. Gibson wanted to just be laid down - back off Mom! Gibson was not a snuggler, nor was a he an up and down baby - he was a side to side baby. So I took a little while to get used to him. Now he is five. He started Kindergarten this fall. While Oliver was a late talker, Gibson spoke early and well. He actual...

I did a lot of theatre in the last 10 years. The most significant shift was that I started to write and actually got some plays produced (I have had 4 plays produced - the first in 2003). For me, the playwriting has been the absolute coolest development. It's funny to think where I started off in the decade. 2000 was a tough year at work. I had shifted into sharing the drama position. It wasn't the sharing that was hard it was working with someone who was clearly unhappy about having to share. I dealt with so many behind the scenes digs and jabs to my self-esteem. They were always delivered behind the scenes and one-on-one and thankfully I had wonderful friends to help me through that year. I also had wonderful students and a great show to direct. I guess The Wiz and One Acts saved that year. Those and the fact I was finally pregnant. Now, 10 years later, it is strange to look back on that year and where I was emotionally with regards to theatre. Dealing with that situation ha...

In 2000 I finally got pregnant. This was after a couple of years of frustration, fertility medication, continued frustration, going off the the fertility medication, seeing a specialist, doing one simple investigative procedure (histosalpingogram - ow!) and then waiting for results. In the *wait time* we finally got pregnant. So in the summer of 2001, after a long non-progressing labour, we had Oliver. A few years later (2004) Gibson came along. So for the bulk of the last decade the having and raising of children has been the most significant thing in my life. Sure, we moved and we bought a store and there's all that theatre stuff, but I would drop all of the other things for the kids in a heartbeat if I had to, so there you have it. Along with kids came the struggle to figure out parenthood. Mark and I come from very different backgrounds. I won't get into the details, as I am sure almost every set of new parents (and old parents dealing with a new aged kid) have to deal with...

We got back from Olds yesterday late afternoon. I caught some sort of Christmas Cold so my sinuses hurt and I have a bit of a sore throat. I also needed sleep. So, instead of sleeping, Mark and I watched the 2 movies I got him for Christmas - Terminator: Salvation and Inglourious Basterds. Awful lot of violence for the holidays! I liked the Terminator movie, but it felt thin. I wonder what someone unfamiliar with the other three movies would think of it, because I don't think it would stand up on its own. Inglourious Basterds was definitely a Tarantino movie. I don't know why I was surprised by the blood and the guts and the gore. I had to avert my eyes many times. It was a good movie, but I am still thinking about what he was trying to say. It would say something quite different without the blood and the violence. Think about it. Anyhow, I slept in a bit this morning. The boys Wii'd and fought and played other stuff and we did more gingerbread men. The living room, which w...

It all went very well, but perhaps we let the boys stay up too late and eat too much crap. We are off to visit Mark's family tomorrow and he would like to leave by 11:30 a.m. I do not think that is going to happen. I want to sleep in. I still need to pack. They boys need to not be rushed around on someone else's time table. They have had a couple of very exciting days, and very late nights and excited early mornings. I got a Webkinz. A Hippopotamus. I think someone heard me singing.

Tonight we will head over to Ma and Pa Strand's for our traditional Christmas Eve dinner of Oyster Stew (it's my Dad's family's thing). Despite not being overly fond of the stew, I will eat mine, because it takes like Christmas for me. I think there has only been one or two years when I did not have Oyster Stew on Christmas Eve. Once when I hosted Christmas Eve in Fort McMurray, I made Lasagna. I think Mark and I spent one Christmas Eve in Olds early on in the marriage. After supper and after the clean-up, we will all gather in the living room and in a somewhat organized chaos, we will open all our gifts from family (Santa's gifts are for Christmas morning). Some time during the evening Annemarie and Paul will either call, or be called and in that way, we will all be there. It is the best night. After all the gift opening, there is usually game playing and visiting and eating lots of sugar cookies and possibly chips and dip. When we were little, we used to get big b...

I took the boys for their H1N1 shots today. I deliberately didn't tell them until just before we went. They both have a tendency to be dramatic (not sure where that comes from) and the longer they would know, they more worked up they would get. So we got the shots and within 5 minutes, Oliver threw up. Yay. That was fun. Gibson was very mad at Oliver and I because we told him it wasn't bad (it wasn't, but he said it was horrible). Luckily my Mom came with us. We waited in the medical room for Oliver's stomach to calm down and for them to make sure it wasn't an allergic reaction and she ran off to Zellers to buy Oliver a new outfit since his was pretty gross. We are home now. You can't tell that just 2 1/2 hours ago Oliver threw up and Gibson was angry at us. They are playing actively and watching the movie that Grandma picked up when she bought the outfit. And hopefully, we are immune to H1N1.

Despite fighting fatigue, I went with Mark and some of the cast of Annie (Sherard) bowling this evening. The boys came too and they were in heaven. It was a nice bonding event for the cast. I am not sure how many of them were in attendance but is was a fun evening. Luckily I will get to sleep in tomorrow. We have a carolling event for Rotary in the afternoon. I have things to do. All this partying is interfering with my preparations for next weekend.

This past week we experienced the boy's school winter concerts. I had to go both nights, because their classes were scheduled on opposite evenings. Most parents only had to experience one evening of the *fun*. Now, I know my disappointment with the evenings has to do with my extensive performance and directing experience and the quality of the Christmas concerts that I saw in Fort McMurray. These did not quite measure up, but that's okay. Everyone had fun and the kids gave it their all. The gym set up is imperfect and the acoustics suck so you can't do much with that. I don't quite understand why all the classes sing along to a recording (including vocal track). Yes, I know the music teacher can't play piano and conduct at the same time, but why not a karaoke track so we can hear the kids, not the vocal track? Oh well, I would do it differently. Some of the parents are up in arms because the focus is more secular than spiritual, but it's a public school so that ...

Only 1 more school day until the Christmas holidays officially begin and I find myself 'dealing with both boys' for 2 weeks. Luckily Mark is closing the store for 2 consecutive 3 day weekends. That will help. No doubt he will want to travel on one of them, but nothing has been mentioned, so I am hoping for real down time. Funny thing about holidays. For me they are often much more work than everyday. Some people get to rest, but they don't think about the other people who are facilitating their rest. Ah well, there are many things I like about the holidays and I shall cling to them and deal with the other stuff when it happens. Any way you slice it, I am one of the lucky ones on the planet ( http://www.100people.org/statistics_detailed_statistics.php ) so a little imposition in a time of extreme plenty should not be drama-worthy. I have held off on the tree and I am hoping I can keep it at bay until Monday so that it can be our 'activity' for that day. I pla...

I am almost done my Christmas cards. So far I have 'finished' 67 of them (about 10 of those need stamps, however. I have more to do, but I ran out of pictures of the boys so I will have to get more of those tomorrow morning and finish the cards off tomorrow afternoon. I postponed my big shopping day until tomorrow because I was worried about my sitter having to drive all the way up here on the roads in their current condition. It is supposed to be better tomorrow and that will be nicer for me, as well. It may get warm enough to not make gassing up the car physically uncomfortable. Tonight is Gibson's Christmas Concert. Oliver's is tomorrow night. I wish we could have gotten the same night. I don't know exactly whey they don't just put the French Immersion classes on one night and the English classes on the other night, but it may have to do with numbers. I think there are significantly more English classes than French ones. Oh well. Two nights out, wra...

Drive kids to school (bus is over 1 hour late) Child Check Sneak peek of Gibson's Christmas Concert Shopping for A's present Dry cleaners Empty dishwasher/dryer/fold laundry/wash load Lunch w/A Shopping w/A - Mr. Big & Tall - Indigo - Moore's - Mark's Work Wear House - Mexx Tim's for Hot Chocolate Pick up Ollie Watch the Wii Play Make supper - Burgers Watch more Wii Visit Drive A to Mom and Dad's

...doesn't mean that I will respect you after you do it. There are a lot of things you can do that are not going to get you arrested, but if you do them and tell me about them, or if they affect me directly, I am still going to judge you. Suck it up. Some of those things might not affect me directly, but I might still think you are an idiot or immoral if you do them. Some of them might affect me directly, but even if your philosophy is 'that you answer to yourself, and yourself alone' be prepared that I might still think you are a moron or a jerk, regardless of your personal philosophy guiding your actions. Don't get me wrong, I don't want to criminalize poor manners, or poor judgement or even selfishness, but if you live in a world with other people, you should be prepared that they might not necessarily think that it's okay that you act within those parameters. By the by, I am not really being specific because this isn't about anything specific, just ...

In my blog surfing I came upon the following post: http://www.rifters.com/crawl/?p=932 in which Peter Watts, a science fiction writer was beaten, pepper sprayed and detained at a US border crossing when returning to Canada. He was detained and then after bail arrangements were made he was dropped off without a coat in the cold and without transportation (they seized his car). His only 'crime' it seems, if getting out of his car to ask what was going on when the border guards swarmed his car. I keep thinking about this. I don't know him, but I am appalled by the way this has all played out for him. To be sure, I only have his testimony so it might have played out differently, but no matter how I play it in my head it is wrong. Now, would I have gotten out of the car? Probably not. Now, would I have been flagged and pulled over, probably not. But in our world, you don't really think this kind of thing can happen. You assume that everyone is reasonable and they ar...

I baked cookies today. I had to replenish all the ones I obviously made too early because they are gone! These ones will go in the deep freeze instead of the kitchen freezer and that should 'help'. I am enjoying having more nights home. I have a few things to get done and this is the last week of school before Christmas so I have to get a lot of it done before the kids are off. We are no longer YMCA members so I am not doing the YMCA camps this year. It's getting easier with both boys. They can usually do 3-4 hours of relatively pleasant interaction and play before a flare up. I am waiting for the day when Gibson is big enough to teach Oliver that it is not a good idea to hit him. I discourage the violence, with consequences, discussions, strategies for better communication etc... but nothing beats a once smaller child standing up for himself and teaching the older one that it's time to stop or get hurt yourself. My sister comes to visit tomorrow. It is a busy...

I'm cold. It's cold. I don't want to complain, because we actually got off pretty easy in it coming so late. It's like Oliver cutting 3 teeth in one weekend - it was a pain of a weekend, but I preferred it to when Gibson took two months to cut one tooth. So, when the dump of snow came on Friday and the temperature plummeted over 2 days, it was fast and shocking, but at least we didn't have weeks of chilling temperatures and having to shovel a cm a day for weeks. I don't know. I am trying to be positive in my funny winter hat.

But I wasn't. I was just out really, really late chatting with folks. However, my 40+ body interprets anything short of 8 hours of sleep as call for a hangover and my head is killing me. Oh, it could be other things, like the temperature drop creating some sort of pressure shift in my body. Usually I feel that in my right foot though (I have broken it twice and I can now predict rain with it). Or, maybe it was caffeine withdrawal because I didn't drink my usual gallons of diet coke yesterday. In any case, I am waiting for the ache to stop because I have the delightful task of driving my go-cart on city streets today and I don't know what kind of shape the roads are in. They were plowing last night in the area I have to go to. I could be lucky. Last night was fun. A wee wine and cheese and tree-trimming at Joyce's where I visited with folks I like to see and chat with but don't always get a chance to. Much talk of theatre because that is 90% of my life it see...

Well we finally have winter. We were a little spoiled in it coming so late so I am not going to complain about it. Between Mark and I, the sidewalks were shovelled 4x today and although I have not looked in a few hours, I am willing to bet you can't tell. I also did the driveway and that will help in future as the layers that pile up should be thinner. Let's hope. I am also hoping the weather did not deter people from getting to Lend Me a Tenor at Walterdale Playhouse. I saw the show in all it's glory on Opening Night and I think they did a fabulous job. It isn't 'high art' but it is hilarious! I could sense some Opening Night tightness off the top, but about 10 minutes in they heard the laughs and loosened up and just ran with it. That's what you do with a farce, get it rolling and hang on! I heard lots of wonderful comments afterwards and I laughed quite a bit despite knowing the script inside and out. Loved so many of their choices! I cancelled...

I has a great evening last night. It was surreal some of the time, but I really enjoyed the show. The casting and choices were very different from the production that I was in, that I was able to see them uniquely and I could appreciate each for what they were. It is so very cool to see this show with a different but totally legitimate ensemble work, but work in ways different from how my show worked. It was also fun to sit outside the action and laugh at the things I couldn't before. The changes surprised and delighted me. It was well-paced and honest and that is what you need to do to bring that show to life. A funny thing happened in the second act that totally caught me off guard. After the 3rd scene I suddenly went to the head space I was in while doing the show. I guess the patterns of dialogue and situation sent me back there and before the lights came up on the 4th scene I was crying and emotionally distraught. I am sure the people on either side of me couldn't...

Tonight I am going to see Steel Magnolias in Spruce Grove at Horizon Stage. It is the closing night of a three show run and they have been sold out or close to that for all the shows. It was directed by my bf AM and I know most of the cast. It is going to be weird. I am hoping that I can separate my experience from being in the show a few years ago from the experience of watching this new production. I will do my best to do so, but don't hate me if I am not able to! I am sure I will enjoy the evening, it's just going to be weird because I know ALL the words!

Okay, I did stuff this week, but I didn't get everything done and that makes me feel like it just flew by. I had some interpersonal angst at the beginning of the week and that caused a lot of unnecessary stress that sucked up oodles of my mental time and brought up all the stress from a month ago that I thought I had pushed into the void. Oliver was sick and stayed home Tuesday, so that day was a write-off. On Thursday, I touched base at the theatre and Theatre Alberta on Thursday and ran into people I hadn't seen for a while so I spent a few hours that day just talking to people. I can't even remember what I did on Wednesday. Oh, where does the time go?

A discussion on a friend's blog lead to this blog post: http://skepticalob.blogspot.com/2009/06/sex-discrimination-feminists-can.html The idea that this happens really bothers me. It makes me think that maybe we shouldn't tell if this is what people are going to do with the information. A baby is a baby and to use gender/sex as determinate for it's validity is horrific to me. I have always had trouble with pro-choice, pro-life - trouble with both sides. They both seem so extreme. One justifies abortion in all cases and one does not recognise that there are situations where that is the best course of action. I am a moderate on this and am glad that I never had to face the decision. I hope I never have to and I hope that if any of my friends come to me for comfort and advice facing that kind of decision that I can be a good friend and give them the support they need regardless of the outcome.

I got a phone call from the vet today. Smeep's lump was benign and with the type of tumor it was excision is curative. Yay! So we should keep an eye (or hand) out for future lumps, but she is fine for now. In a week the stitches should come out and then it is just wait for her next shot. I am quite relieved.

I have read several updates on Facebook this week about people decorating for Christmas already. I am not there. It shakes me when there are Christmas things in the stores before Halloween is done. Decorating this early for a festival that occurs on December 24th/25th seems ridiculous to me. I know, some of you out there might decorate this early. That's your prerogative. But this is the nature of our society of excess. We take a 12 day Festival that is supposed to START on Dec 25 (I Believe - possibly the 24th, but Christmas kicks off the 12 days of Christmas, not ends it) and then we start the festival atmosphere on November 15th or earlier and then we lose the specialness of the actual holiday. What makes Christmas special if we celebrate it for a month and a half? I can see the coordinated holiday parties occurring prior to the day, but I just think that we live such spoiled lives in our society as it is, that to demand the lengthening of the Christmas holiday just ...

Smeep is home. She seems to be doing well and we will find out in a week or so about the results from the lab. She is leaving the sutures alone and is a bit clingy, but that is expected. Hopefully all will be well. It strikes me as strange compared to how we dealt with our pets as children. I am pretty sure we did not take any of our cats for yearly shots. We let them run around outside and the only time they went to the vet was to get fixed or if they were visibly injured. If the repair cost a significant amount of money I am pretty sure that my parents went the way of euthanasia. But Smeep is a part of our family. She's been here longer than the boys have. I couldn't see not getting the lump removed and tested, although I was relieved that it cost less than the $500 the doctor originally quoted. Who knows, down the line it may cost more. When I was picking her up there was an elderly gentlemen leaving the back room alone who looked quite shook up as though he'd be...

My cat Smeep is at the vet today. She had a small lump on her back and they are removing it and testing it. The Vet says it looks like melanoma. We will not know what it is until next week and I am hoping it is benign. She's a really nice cat.

I had a lovely night out yesterday. Rock n' Roll by Tom Stoppard is playing at the Citadel and my University roommate from waaaaaaay back is in it. I was so excited to see her head shot on the Citadel's website as I have not seen her onstage for 9 years (Stratford in Summer 2000). She primarily works in the East since she lives in Toronto and Stratford, but this co-pro with The Canadian Stage Company was a nice opportunity for her to come back to Edmonton for a stint. When I wrote her she did reply "you realize I am only in about 8 minutes in the latter half of Act Two". Didn't matter. I wanted to see her and the show as it sounded like a show that involved thinking and wasn't necessarily predictable. We met for a nice dinner and visit before the show and then I met up with Mark and friends to see the show. Following the show we met up with her in the lobby and she introduced us to some of the cast (including Fiona Reid who played the female lead). So ...

I have been thinking about this since last night. One of the responses that I got from the Team when I asked why they hadn't come to me for help was that "they didn't want me to burn out". This has been expressed to me in the past, but I really don't know why. I always ask, "Do I look like I'm burning out?" and the responses is usually "no, but so and so did and we don't want to lose good people by wearing them out". I understand the concern, but I am very good about only taking on what I can handle. I have learned to say "no" when needed and I only take on what I really want to or need to. There is a point when the same people keep getting asked and I think we need to expand the pool that we pick from and talk to different people so we don't over tax certain people, but as AD I certainly want the membership to come to me if needed.

Yesterday I spent from 9-3 at Walterdale working with the Board on Policy and Procedures. That was good but I was very tired from being out the night before (A Chorus Line). Then I scooted off to the Post Mortem for Come Back to the Five & Dime, Jimmy Dean, Jimmy Dean. That took a little longer than I thought it would, but I am glad we got it done. The major complaints/issues were with one particular person and that will need to be addressed. There are other issues to be looked after, and I will get on starting those in motion today. 90% of all issues that happen in our organization (and in most) have to do with communication. There were many things that came up to which I said "How come I didn't know about this when it was happening - I would've helped" but the perception was that it wasn't my job to help in those cases. I believe that if you aren't getting the help you need then come to me. I may not be able to help directly, but I can usually get...

I am in between projects right now - not really, but it feels like it. I do have a script I need to work on for New Works , but the time to work on that is flexible, not scheduled like when you are in rehearsal. Soon I will be in rehearsal and that will shift my work schedule on that, but for right now, 2 weeks after Sweeney and a week before New Works auditions, I am in a lull. The worst thing about lull time is that I eat more. It is strictly boredom and because it's there eating, but it happens and that sucks. So, to try and make the lull work for me, today I finally wrote several drafts for the Handbook we are putting together at Walterdale. I wrote about Theatre Etiquette for Audiences and Actors (and Production Teams as a whole) and I wrote about Rehearsals (for the Director and the Actor) and the Previews and Late-Comers Policies. There was a whole lot of writing. I think at the end I got kind of snippy, because some of the stuff I shouldn't have to spell out, but cl...

This weekend the Walterdale Theatre Board of Directors will be meeting to work on our policies and procedures. This is something we have been loosely working on for the past 3 years and in the last year we became much more focused and directed in terms of getting it all together. My hope is that we will produce a document that can be a good guide for the various teams that come through the building and that it will offer assistance but will still be flexible to allow for a variety of personalities. Because this is the challenge. Every team that comes through the theatre is unique and has it's own style of communication and ways of doing things. There are some people that might be the same from team to team, but change one designer, one ASM and you get a slightly different dynamics. And I have noticed that because these teams come from different levels of training and experience there are plenty of people who break the rules. Here are two extremes that I have seen that make me cring...

Last night was my 3rd Annual 40th Birthday Party. I do not have it to prolong my youth , but rather because the 1st one was so fun, I decided to keep having that party, once a year, every year, until I hit 50! I was a month off the actual birth date, but Sweeney kind of ate up the month of October, so no worries! In any case, it was so much fun. I am blessed to know so many wonderful, fun and talented people. They kept the karaoke machine running all night long from 7:20 p.m. until 3:15 a.m. (I was pretty good in my assessment that the party would go to 3:00 a.m.). We had people ranging in age from 3 1/2 months to older than me (I am not outing anyone's age!). We had the Fuss Cupcakes that I love (I think I will invest in more minis and less full size ones next year - that way you can try more than one and not feel like a piggy!). I missed a few people that couldn't make it, or forgot, or got ill at the last minute, but the BEST was that my sister surprised me by flying...

Today I went into the school and read in both my boys' classrooms for Read-In Week . I had a lot of fun and I liked being in the classrooms to get a sense of the classroom culture. I am so far please with this year's school. Gibson has adjusted quite well to Kindergarten and Oliver really seems to have settled down this year. I think he is developing the maturity I have been hoping for over the past few years. This week, Oliver did his homework (correctly) on the bus every day so that he had no homework to do at the table before 'fun time'. Nothing like hearing "I did all my work on the bus, Mom" to make a Mom happy! I spoke to Oliver's teacher about coming in later in the year about reading (she asked me, actually - I guess she liked my funny voices) and I hope to visit Gib's class again. This is one of the reasons I am 'home' - so that I can be that parent volunteer and really connect to their educational journey.

I've spent so much time this week putting out fires... I can't really talk about it, but I would get a lot more done if I didn't have to deal with arising issues...

This weekend, despite being sick, I went out to see some art. The first thing I went to was The Drowsy Chaperone at the Citadel on Friday night. It was our Anniversary do-over, since the first 'date' had to be scrapped back in August. It was delightful! I was so very pleased with it. Earlier in the month I had a chance to see it for free, but because of rehearsals I was unable to go. I didn't even mind paying full price for the tickets. I had heard about the show a few years ago, but other than the number "Show Off" that I saw at the Tony's a few years back I had no real knowledge of the show. Everyone I know who saw it said it was good, and I was so pleased that it fulfilled my expectations! It said what I believe about musicals. A lot of people write them off as fluff, but what is wrong with a little fluff to make you feel good? And everyone was soooo good. They were a true ensemble and each had their moments and no one was phoning it it. Simpl...

Mark will be playing Daddy Warbucks in Sherard Theatre's production of Annie . It goes up in February and I will be sending out all sorts of information to promote it when we get closer t the date. Yahoo for Mark! I am glad he will have an opportunity to show what he can do. He was sure he totally blew the audition, but I should know not to trust him. He only ever thought one of his auditions was good (the one he did for The Other Side of the Pole ) so he discounted the audition that got him Pilate in Jesus Christ Superstar . I should know better than to trust his personal evaluation! I am so looking forward to seeing him onstage and hearing him sing and it is a show the boys will be able to go to, as well. It is one of their favorites! Yippee! He will also be working with my good friend Linette who is directing and she is so wonderful to work with. Its a good show for him, because he is great with kids (doesn't mind being around them, at all) and it uses his height...

I received a message from a fellow school parent this morning. Apparently Halloween dress-up has been cancelled. She was quite upset about this, because Halloween is her favorite holiday and she wants it to be the same experience for her children. She asked the school office about it and was told " More kids don't dress up, than do..." so her perception was that certain populations in the school were dictating the abolishment of the Halloween tradition. I told her I would write to the school principal to find out if this was the case. Halloween falls on a Saturday and apparently there is no school on the 30th (Friday) so the 29th was to be a dress in orange and black day. I have worked in schools so I figured there was more to it. This is the official response from the principal: Since Halloween does not happen until Saturday, October 31 and there is no school for students on Friday, October 30 a decision was made by staff to have an orange/black theme day on Thursday, O...

My throat hurts. It felt a little hoarse yesterday, but I thought that was just 2 very late nights at Walterdale (Friday - getting ready for the Open House and AGM, and Saturday - the actual Open House and AGM). I wasn't worried until this morning. Now, just after supper and I am in quite a bit of pain. I am supposed to rehearse Sweeney and my number for the Sweeney Fundraiser tomorrow. I will dose myself with Tylenol and Ibuprofen and hope for the best. The song I am doing is a big sing, and tomorrow may be the only chance I get to rehearse before the Fundraiser so I do not want to waste it. The Open House and AGM went really well. We estimated 100-200 people through the Open House. I don't know who counted, but someone threw those numbers out. I think we were closer to the 100 figure, but it was quite busy between 12:30 and 2:30 so who knows? We handed out many, many season brochures and Jimmy Dean Flyers so hopefully the personal touch sells a few tickets. I was p...

Tonight my husband is auditioning for a show. Usually that is my thing to do, but the opportunity fits him better and the time commitment nestles in a good place for me (After Sweeney and before Whorehouse) so I suggested he audition. If he gets the part then it will mean a little bit of a role reversal but that could be cool. I have to watch my scheduling as it is, but this would give him an opportunity to get out there and show what he can do. I trust the director of the show so I think it would be a great opportunity. I cross my fingers and think good auditioning thoughts and send them out across the city!

At 9:15 a.m. I was awakened by a phone call from the school. Oliver was sick, throwing up, could I come get him? I, of course, got up, got dressed and got him and then re-planned my day and evening. A child who is throwing up is too sick to leave with a baby sitter so I had to cancel my rehearsal. Even if he was feeling better tonight, I don't know that now and it's just not something you can count on. I am house-bound and that means I cannot do the bank deposit and some other running around I had planned. Gah! Just as I was beginning to enjoy the freedom of having 1/2 days all to myself!

I always hope that there will be peace downstairs and that I might possibly get to sleep in on Saturdays, but no matter what, the minute that Mark leaves the house I hear the thump thump thump of Oliver running up the stairs to crawl in with me to snuggle. He's a snuggler and has always been, but it's kind of annoying when I am trying to sleep. Besides that, he's an eight year old who is the size of a 10-11 year old and he is all arms and legs so it is a far cry from snuggling with him when he was 3! Also, Mark didn't get them breakfast before they left so hunger was a shrill complaint that forced me out of bed and down to the kitchen. Apparently Mark thought Oliver was on top of getting them breakfast, but Oliver thought he just had to get the bowls and spoons out so there was a communication gap. Ah ga ga glug gulp... So, in November, this might not bother me so much, but today when I still feel like crap and I have been out late 4 of 5 nights and I have been up early...

Typically in my life I go through these intense periods where I have several things on the go and I think I will not survive getting all of them done and then when I do I go through a lull where I find myself with lots of time on my hands. I have been in a busy period since last fall. I do have a bit of a lull on the calendar starting at the end of October and I am so looking forward to that. I am most frustrated with the 'other things' that pop into my life to suck up time I could be using to get things done. I have spent a lot of time this week dealing with stuff that I shouldn't have to. If you don't like my answer, sometimes that's just too bad. Sometimes we have to compromise. And a compromise means no one gets exactly what they want but everybody gets a little bit of what they want. I rarely get exactly what I want, why do people expect they should be different? Grrrr... At Sweeney I snapped at someone who brought an issue to me that they should've...

Remind me not to pick up another project outside of Walterdale during my tenure as Artistic Director... What was I thinking? Don't worry, the show will be good and the theatre is in good hands. It is just a matter of how thin I stretch myself. I have my own self to blame for it, I guess. On a more positive note, the first night of auditions for Lend Me a Tenor went swimmingly. We had so many wonderful actors come out. I read with quite a few (filling in) and was suddenly wishing I were auditioning too, but I can't do that time slot again. Besides, I'd really want to play Tito, and that's a little out of the question! Whoever is cast, this will be a very fun show!

We finished up today. The show went well. I now will go away and rewrite and fix the sections that need tightening and general 'fixing'. There are a few places. After the show I rounded out my Fringe experience by going to The Wedding Ruiner . It was very funny and a nice light way to end my Fringe. I needed the laughs. I liked the concept and especially the poetry and rap. I did want a little more Chicken Dance, but who doesn't? Earlier in the week I saw Bashir Lazhar and really liked that piece. I would love to be able to produce that level of work someday. I was in awe of how clean it was conceptually. Everything was right. I am so glad they got into holdovers. They got great turn-outs and they deserved it. I also saw Addition and I was very entertained by it. I wasn't sure going in if I was going to relate to it, but it was very funny and well directed and performed. I laughed a lot and thought it was a great piece. I am pleased to say that even though I didn'...

This week, my Grandmother, Margaret Ann Strand, passed away. We were expecting it. We had about a week's notice that the infection she had was not improving and that there was little the doctors could do about it. She was ready to go. We were not ready for her to leave us. All her life she looked after other people. She was one of the oldest of several children so she no doubt spent much of her childhood helping to care for the younger children in the family. She married my Grandfather and they had 5 children, whom she raised into wonderful, strong willed, smart and educated adults. My grandfather had several bouts of cancer (lung and prostate) and she spent much of the end of his life caring for him as well as providing support for her 5 adult children and their families. After my grandfather passed away 9 years ago she became the one everyone looked after. It must be hard to shift to that position. We corresponded quite a bit. I love letter writing and she was always good to w...

Darn that Drama 103! I had finally got myself to the point where I could just watch and enjoy and then I took that class and it made me approach things from a really critical perspective again. So, sorry if my reviews have been tough. I want to like everything, I just can't seem to watch without dissecting things. Blah!

Can't seem to write much more about it than that. It is hard to be in limbo, but wanting the limbo to end doesn't feel good either. I wish I was there and I wish I had a more recent update and I wish all the other stuff in my life wasn't distracting me (but I am glad it is distracting, as well). Blah.

I quite like road trips and this one was very special. It had the extra benefit of helping us bond as a group. When you write a play with 3 sisters you want them to feel connected despite the fact that they didn't all grow up together and some of them have known each other for a very short time. A 5 hour drive, followed by 3 days in a city that 3 of the people had never been to before, sharing accommodations and celebrating in a pub will certainly build bonds! Fort McMurray and Interplay was very welcoming to us and despite smaller houses than we liked we felt the play was very well received by those who came. It also gave the girls 5 performances in front of audiences before they do the Fringe run. That should make them really tight. Some Fringe shows are still feeling their legs when they open. I think this trip will eliminate that for us.

Interplay Theatrical Excellence Awards Sponsored by Julio Florez of Royal LePage True North Realty Best Play, $500 – Haiku Best Actor, $250 – Jeff Rivet, Dr. Horrible’s Sing Along Blog Best Actress, $250 – Julie Sinclair, From Something Best Director, $250 – Kristen Finlay, From Something Technical Achievement, $250 – Dr. Horrible’s Sing Along Blog

Tomorrow I leave for Fort McMurray for Interplay. I spent this morning photocopying leaflets and programs. I am unsure as to how many to make. I made 280 leaflets and 300 programs. If we need more programs we will photocopy more there. If we sell 300 tickets I will be delighted! We will also ask people to recycle, so hopefully they will. Nothing bugs me more than wasted paper and if you aren't going to use the thing again, then recycle it! I am looking forward to seeing all my old friends and the old haunts and I hope to see them at the show and at the Interplay site. I just hope we don' t forget anything! I just did an interview with the Fort McMurray Today on the play and coming back to McMurray and aside from Gibson crying non-stop in the background it went really well. I hope we get a nice article from it!

It pays to think positively. I just felt it. I knew it from the beginning when we were #12, then when we moved up to #9 and then #6, I was not worried. When we sat at #1 for over 3 weeks, I felt we were already there. Yesterday we got the call... We are in the Edmonton International Fringe. Our venue is great (The Westbury - Transalta Stage), our Times are great, we get 75 minutes and a 3 1/2 hour tech on a night we are in town. Finally Sauces presents From Something Stage #1 - Transalta/Westbury Thurs, Aug 13 - 8:00 p.m.Sat, Aug 15 - 12:15 p.m. Tues, Aug 18 - 2:45 p.m. Thurs, Aug 20 - 6:15 p.m. Fri, Aug 21 - 11:15 p.m. Sun, Aug 23 - 4:15 p.m.

I look around and the monumental task of tidying it just overwhelms me. Plus I have other things that are technically work, but far more enjoyable, that I would rather do... sigh, I guess I should get out the vacuum cleaner...

It is good to breathe the Edmonton air. Already the boys both sound better so I wonder if the 'cold' that both of them were hit with was really allergies to something in Minnesota. We got in later than expected last night. A delayed flight to Toronto from Thunder Bay in the morning resulted in re-scheduling our connection and spending far too much time in the Thunder Bay Airport. I lost it a bit here and there, but was more frustrated with Air Canada (not having anyone on the desk, not being able to seat us together initially, delaying the flight to begin with...) and I know that it is difficult to expect 2 young boys to stand still for an hour while we wait for help to fix the problems. It is good to be home, and now we wait for my luggage which they said would be here this morning but will likely not make it until the afternoon based on the phone call I just received. I indicated to the caller that I was a little annoyed that it would not be here in the morning as I had ...

On Wednesday, in the early hours, I will be leaving with my two sons on a plane to Thunder Bay, Ontario. Once there we will pick up the rental car I have booked and drive to the ancestral home in Beaver Bay, Minnesota and further to Duluth the next day for a Strand Family Reunion. I am not one of those people who hates family reunions. I quite love them. I am feeling a bit of trepidation about travelling and being alone with the boys for a week. They require a lot of energy. I am looking forward to seeing all the cousins and aunt and uncles and re-visiting all the haunts of my childhood. It always looks different, but the same.

It was a cranky day but maybe tomorrow will be better. I am glad for the haircut, and the fact I can sleep in tomorrow. I still have to sort out my packing, but Mom says she and Dad can take some stuff for me in their car. That will be nice. It is going to be a long journey with just me and the boys.

This week we were much more successful weather-wise and soccer-wise. If all goes well we will have our last day of soccer tomorrow. It took Gibson 2 days to settle in and today he went to the class with no issues. He had more challenges in the playground afterwards when his sand castle got stepped on and he banged his head twice on the slide. He is also going through a 'I want to play, but I want the rules to favour me' phase which is really annoying. After soccer we went to see Ice Age 3: The Age of the Dinosaurs . It was hot and the movie theatre was air conditioned. Lovely. This weekend Mark and I went to The Lion King at the Jubilee. It is part of the Broadway Across Canada package. This was the show that made me most want to buy this season. It was wonderful. Conceptually it was so complete. The puppetry and the set and the lighting were amazing. Some mic balance issues and the young Simba was occasionally robotic, but he was only 11, what can you do?

It's a bit of a challenge to deal with rainy days during summer holidays. The boys have been pretty good considering we are pretty much house bound, but I would love to have a dry day so we can get outside! Saw You're a Good Man, Charlie Brown at Walterdale earlier this evening and we all had a great time. I knew it would be strange to see it considering I have directed it before and it remains one of my most favorite directing experiences, but the choices were so different that I didn't compare and just enjoyed watching and listening to the boys laugh and relate to it. Gibson was so rapt any time there was music. This was his first 2 Act Play and he did pretty good. Oliver gets what a play is a little better now and he was asking about the program and things like that. It was pretty cool.

Time. I had a rehearsal planned for this afternoon for the Interplay/Fringe show and one of my actresses called to say she was experiencing a bout of the stomach flu. She is in almost every scene and when I tracked through to see what I could do with the other two ladies I found about 2 1/2 pages. One of them has to drive in from Stony Plain and I didn't think that was fair so I cancelled the rehearsal. This will mean the rest of the schedule is tight, but we will make it work. And now I have some time. There is always laundry and grocery shopping and cleaning to do, but maybe I can actually do some writing or take a nap. Both of those sound very good.

I went in to the theatre on the weekend to 'help' paint the Charlie Brown set and have since spent 4 days there painting, watching paint dry and waiting around until someone could help with set up so I could paint. The job was much bigger than anticipated and there was no plan in place to get it done. Once we got a grip on what was entailed in completing the process (Wednesday night - late, late, late) we sat down as a small group of painters (3 of us) and made a much needed plan. Hopefully we will be done tonight. If all goes according to plan, we should be. I know that it will look really cool and will be all lovely, so that is what pushes me to do it. I really didn't have the time to spare, but apparently no one else did either. I felt really guilty that I couldn't go help last night, but I had other plans and I shouldn't feel that way. I had only thought I would be going in for a few hours on the weekend, not spending 4 days in there (including all of Ca...

So, frustrated with my perception of 'too late' with Ollie's grade 2 year I decided to put together a plan for doing what I can this summer to help him improve over the summer. The big issues seems to be focus (behavioral) and writing (cognitive/process). I can only do so much with the focus issue as it is one thing to get a a single child to focus and quite another in a class of 28 (what his class in the fall will have). So, today I made a worksheet up asking simple questions about our trip to the museum yesterday. The answers could then be taken and used to write a short story about the day. I am not skilled in Division I. I do not know what they are supposed to be able to do, so I had to rely on Ollie's cues about how skilled he should be. He wasn't happy about the exercise, but once we finished it, he seemed a lot more relaxed about it. He was really stressed about the idea of writing a story. This is hard for me to deal with because prior to this year h...

After some emails back and forth it has become clear to me that what I thought was good communication with the grade 2 teacher throughout the year was not so good. There is a major failure in the reporting process as well. " Work meets acceptable standard " sounds better than it is and Effort: Satisfactory apparently does not really mean that either. In my mind, if the effort of my child is causing him to achieve below what he is capable of then there is NO WAY you can call that Satisfactory. I have a problem with how many teachers assess and communicate. They do not separate behaviour from ability. Do not tell me 'he is doing fine' when he is in the 50-64%!!! Not when he could be doing so much better. Don't feel like you have to sugar coat the message because you don't want to hurt my feelings. AND if you (as teacher) think that is fine, then that tells me you think my kid is not that bright. That just pisses me off. AND WHY is a "C" = to acceptabl...

Oliver finished up on Friday and Gibson had his last day of daycare on Thursday. They both came home with memory books that I will put away in their treasure boxes and then I will cull the rest of the detritus from the bottom of their backpacks. Crafts are lovely in the moment, but I don't want to be carting around 5 billion pastel crayon, macaroni pictures! The sugar cube pyramid will stay but only as long as it stays secure from vermin. Anyhow, I feel a paper purge coming on! I think they both had good years. The Division I reporting system is a bit annoying. If the chart is to be believed then the Descriptor "Work meets acceptable standard" is only 50-64% or a C. If the "Work exceeds the acceptable standard" it is equivalent to a 65-79% or a B. This doesn't make much sense to me and I think that it is the fault of the chart. I will be talking to the teachers next year about this and where I expect Oliver to be. If he is achieving below an A le...

So, now that I am over 40 I have to endure mammograms. I had my first 2 weeks ago. I expected the squishing and the discomfort (I watch Oprah). I did not expect to have to go back for an ultrasound due to 'unusual tissue' (not scary looking - she reassured me). I am happy to announce that the weird looking tissue was just lymph nodes (and possibly a blood vessel). So, nothing to worry about, which I did for about a week and a half between tests.

Yesterday was Father's Day - Mark's choice of activity. He decided he wanted to go to Fort Edmonton Park. So we did. It was nice. We started at the little carnival and the boys had fun. Gibson didn't want to do the Ferris Wheel, so Mark and Oliver took a spin. We visited the fish pond and walked away with some little prizes ( every one's a winner), then the big carousel. I went on with the boys, just to keep an eye on them. We rode the streetcar over to 1920's street and found some food and discovered that every place we went said 'no debit'. Luckily we found $25 on our persons and we could get a few things. The boys didn't mind. The things they wanted to do didn't cost money or else we already had some tickets. The day was overcast but didn't rain, so it was all good that way. Anyhow, we had fun, and really, the lack of debit machines just saved us money in the long run!

I read the letters in the Journal today. This whole issue is coloured by generalizations and judgement and I know, I am not without guilt on that matter. I do try to see the whole picture and I feel comfortable 'thinking aloud' on my blog on this issue as opposed to writing in to the Journal with a snapshot of how I feel at one moment or in reaction to an over-generalized comment that someone else has written that I feel attacks me unfairly (for example, I do not 'do everything' for my kids - I teach them to do things for themselves). Anyhow, I wish this issue wasn't so polarized. I wish we made child-raising a priority in our culture, whether that means compensating those who do it in as a profession more, or stopping the belittlement of those who choose to stay home. I do recognize that just like home-schooling, there are those who do the job well and those that do not. Not every Stay at Home Parent is a saint or a genius at the job. Similarly, there are man...

Lots of buzz about the Iris Evans comments on parenting. I wish I could hear the whole thing, because I think the comment was contextual. Even if it wasn't I wonder what the big deal was. No, I don't wonder, I know who's upset. The same thing happens when someone makes a broad statement about breastfeeding (breast is best), those who chose not to get their noses out of joint. I think we should aspire to what is best, fully acknowledging that there are circumstances that prevent everyone from achieving that. For example, a vaginal delivery is 'best', but I couldn't have one with Oliver (he might not have made it). Do I think that people should schedule c-sections, like Britney Spears and Christina Aguilera? NO - that is idiotic. But, a c-section is necessary to prevent a lot of dead babies and mommies. Breast is best, it's a proven fact. There are, however, some women who try and cannot breast feed (inverted nipples, babies not getting enough, etc...). Do I t...