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Sunday, August 29, 2010

A Cautious Exterior...

I think I make a good first impression. I could be wrong, but I feel pretty good about how I first meet people. It have been interesting meeting new people, however, since I moved to Edmonton. One thing about McMurray is that most people didn't start out there. They are used to the influx of new people looking to find friends in the new place that they might be in for awhile. In Edmonton it has been different. I have noticed that a lot of people are far more guarded when I first meet them. I am not sure why that is. What I have learned to do is discard the first impression and go on the 2nd or even the 3rd meeting as my gauge for who this person is. What is even more interesting is that I have had friends on both sides of a meeting tell me that they didn't think the other person liked them based on their first impression. They are both being territorial and guarded and they both are seeing that in the other person and so they both come away from the meeting thinking the other person stand-offish or unfriendly. I don't know what to say. I generally say, Give it another time or two... I like them, you trust my judgement, don't you?

Anyhow, I have noticed this at parties, at meetings, at baby showers, at auditions, and at first rehearsals. I know that some of those situations have tensions associated with them. At others I look for our common friend. If I trust their judgement in a person, I give the individual a pass on that first meeting and hope for better at the next. That's all you can do.


Annemarie said...

Interesting post.

I've become more guarded because I found that people were disliking me after a first meeting because I was too open/friendly.

People are funny.

Finster said...

I know... I think they are quicker to judge. People seem to expect perfection from everyone else and they don't think about how they measure up.

I continue to be open and friendly, and if people don't like that they can just deal with it!

Finster said...

Recently I had 2 friends who I have known for a long time, meet, and then they both independently told me that they weren't impressed with their first impression of the other person.

I didn't tell either of them about the impression they made, because how do you do that?