In the rational part of my brain/life I know that I have many, many blue clouds floating up above me. I have a crap-load to be grateful for and rationally I appreciate those things. I really, really do. When I suss it all out, and parse it and see it all - I am in a fabulous place. But, like most people I think, I go through these phases of grey clouds. I'm in one right now. No matter how much I speak up to my irrational brain with the rational part of my brain I see negative stuff. I feel cranky. Now, there is something specific happening that does currently contribute to this - it isn't coming out of nowhere - but it is getting harder to maintain the blue cloud exterior. People say things to me and I automatically reinterpret them in my head as a negative when they could probably have been completely neutral, or maybe they were negative things and I am right and that's why I am grumpy. I don't know. I know I am sad for some things ending and feel like I am being pushe