Looking Back/Looking Forward

Last post of the year...

A good year.  Sometimes I was busier than I would have liked and sometimes I was less busy than I would have liked.  It all evens out in the end.  I leave 2012 excited for what is on the horizon in 2013 and knowing that with my two major projects that the first five months will be very busy.  I am working hard this week to schedule, schedule, schedule so that Spelling Bee and From Cradle to Stage are organized ahead of time and not on the fly. 

After those are done, I am not sure.  Finally Sauces is investigating BYOVs for Fringe, but if we don't get those then we will move to Plan B.  Just have to figure out what Plan B is... I have some ideas. The other Fringe project definitely has a Plan B that we just need to decide on details for. So, you see... busy.

The country is in a weird place right now.  Idle No More has replaced Occupy as the latest rallying movement.  It seems to be more organized and have more focus, but like Occupy, I still have trouble connecting with it.  It's hard to have 6-10% of the country's population telling you that they want to dictate what is best. Isn't that why we have elections? I still don't understand if this bill (C-45) and others violate the agreements in place, why there is not a legal way to prevent it.  And I do not personally connect to round dances and hunger strikes and train stoppages. Part of it is a cultural disconnection (I'm not even big on my own cultural rituals so imagine how someone else's won't grab me) and part of it is my respect for following the rules.  I'm a rule follower and I know I'd've been so ticked off to have been on that train. The cynical me always thinks it's really all about money - not the environment - but I always think that economics are always the fuel behind any push.  I'll keep reading.  It's hard to sort through the rhetoric.  It's better than Occupy was for information dissemination, but still hard.  It's also hard to respect some of those pushing Idle No More when they use words like Evil, Douchebag and Racist to describe anyone who does not agree with them. For a movement that preaches that it is open to all it has some very vocal supporters who seem very antagonistic and closed off. Sigh. Anyhow, I will welcome links that help explain the situation better, but please stay away from rhetoric.  I'm a facts and figures person.

Anyhow, I felt more grown-up this year than ever before.  Actually this was the first year in my life where I actually felt OLD.  I am 45, how come it took so long to hit? I don't know.  But I felt it.  I felt a real shift in how I felt about myself and other things.  There were many times when I lost patience with childishness and incompetence. I felt like an old man... I hope this passes... I think it's part of me still trying to figure out what I want to be when I grow up and realizing that I have to figure it out fast if I want to get it done. Maybe this year...

Goals for the Year:
1) Submit a play to APC and cross my fingers
2) Submit scripts to at least 10 competitions
3) Finish first draft of Pitchfork
4) Finish second draft of The Easy Road
5) Finish Fourth draft of Little Monsters
6) Go to or be involved in at least 50 Theatrical Events

Dream Goals for the Year:
1) Take the boys to Disneyland/Disneyworld
2) Visit Toronto
3) Visit Havasu

Let's see what happens.

New Year's Resolutions

A New Year - 2012

So, first of all, I will work on my weight and fitness. My extended family has a group of us working on this in 10 week chunks. We check in via email and we did one leading up to New Years. I did okay - losing 10.3 lbs and then gaining a bit of that back over Christmas (sigh). I am down 8 lbs from that starting point. I like the 10 week chunks of time and plan to make 10 lbs per 10 weeks my goal. I like the 10 weeks because it means I can 're-new' my plan every ten weeks and not let it get lost in the busy of my life. I do find that I do much worse when I have the kids home so hopefully when they go back to school on Monday I can get back on track. Recovering from Christmas et al has been a challenge.

Second is my theatrical goal. I plan on seeing a minimum of 40 theatre or arts events this year. I actually think that is lower than what I want, but manageable. I have never kept track before so I may find that after this year I will up that total! The way I see it, that is only 3-4 events per month and that hardly sounds difficult! The hardest part will be when I am in rehearsal for Nine, because I know that my instincts will be to stay home on the nights off from rehearsal. This month I am starting out with Beauty & the Beast (Broadway Across Canada), and I hope to make it to the Canoe Festival (Workshop West). Surreal SoReal has Big Shot, and I have my ear to the ground for other shows to see. Next month is a lot more dense but I also have a show opening so I have to get to them when I can! Anyhow, I am excited about this goal!

Third is my writing goal. I want to write more. I am determined to have a script finished to submit to the APN Competition in March. This might just be the matter of choosing which to work on and dedicate time to.

That's enough for goals for now. I also want to sort out what exactly I am doing with my education at the University of Alberta. Something is holding me back from dropping Drama 240, but I am pretty sure I need to as I do not think I can handle 2 classes and I think Drama 409 is a better fit for what I want to get out of the experience. I think I need to sleep on it.

Good News

Weekly Weigh-in. Despite my worrying, I was delightfully down this week. I was down 1.2 lbs from my starting weight and 2.4 lbs down from last week so I will thank the time on the treadmill yesterday as well as watching what and when I ate the last couple of days. I also suggested to my Mom that we make some weekly goals so that we have more purpose to get us to the next week. My 3 goals are to work-out significantly (1 hour or longer) for at least 4 days this week, stay within 1300-2000 calories per day, and to not eat after 8 p.m. Hopefully those three goals will serve me well.

Went back to class today. It was fun. Lovely Gil let me borrow his notes to type out at home and bring back Friday. He trusts me - that's nice. I enjoyed the lecture and I like the kids I sit with. They are friendly and interested.

I worked on masks for Much Ado last night. I can only do the basic masks for now until I get fabric samples and costume designs, but that is a lot of groundwork. I got three basic masks done last night, and another finished this morning and I am currently working on 2 more. The nice thing about the method I am using is that if I do not like the shape I can cut off the part I don't like and build the mask up again until I like the shape. I know I could just buy commercial masks, but this is cheaper money wise (not time wise) and more importantly, I feel it is more of an artistic process for me. I enjoy the creation of the masks and the painting and decorating and marking it cohesive with the costumes and the concept of the show. I know they won't be onstage very long, but that's not the point.

Milestones and Millstones

Today I am forty. I like it. I have been thinking about this birthday for most of the year and since I've had slightly over 9 months to think it has more weight than any of the birthdays I have had in recent years. I think it is exciting for me to be 40 because I don't look 40 (I don't think everyone is lying) and because I can say that I have done significant things in my life so that I feel this "milestone" has merit beyond just the counting of days and years. Over the years I have set goals for myself and reached them, or not, but I still reached for them. Things like having children (a challenging goal for me to achieve), getting lead roles on stage (so much fun and therapy all rolled up together), writing a play and having it produced (butterflies!), and many other things are the accomplishments I cherish.

My major goal this year was about weight loss. On January 1, 2007 I weighed myself and made a goal. My vow was to lose 40 lbs by my birthday (today). This was achievable, yet a big enough project that it would require a lot of work. I fell short. I have only lost 30 lbs, however, it is not a millstone worn around my neck. Failing to reach the goal was not a true failure. How can I be sad about losing 30 lbs? I can't. The thing is, it I had not made the goal, I would not have lost what I did. I would have been at least 20 lbs heavier. I guarantee that. The goal made me work harder than I would have without it. The goal made me get up and go to Weight Watchers. The goal got me to the YMCA and the Treadmill. So I will continue to set goals. And I will set goals that will challenge me, ones that aren't easy to accomplish.

My goal today. For the immediate, I want to celebrate this day and this year. I have been blessed with lots of Facebook greetings, many kisses from my boys, and a promised kidnapping tonight. For the long term? I want to be down another 20 lbs by New Years. That will be 50 lbs this year. That will be work since Halloween and Christmas and snowfalls are in the next three months. it is what I shall reach for.

WW Check in

I had missed a week at WW and got there today with Mom. I was happy to be down an additional 0.6 lbs for a total of 15.4 lbs. So I got another 5 lb sticker ('cause I like them!). I have to keep reminding myself that even though I have a long way to go (at least another 50 in my mind) I am doing great. I think because 15 is a small part of the total it doesn't feel as significant as I want it to. For some people 15 would be insurmountable. My new goal is to get my 10% by the end of the month. I think I can, I think I can...