What Do I Want to Be When I Grow Up?

The last few weeks have felt very strange to me. I have been sick, that hasn't helped, but I have also been in a weird kind of funk about what my focus is right now. Because the last two years I had a purpose and artistic vision through Walterdale, now that my term as AD is complete I am realizing I need to find that same kind of purpose for my own life, but I am not sure how. I know I need to really focus on my writing, but I am not spending the time I should on that. There are other personal things I need to be doing with regards to my health, but I am not spending the time I should on that, either (being sick has not helped there). I feel stretched thin with my kids - trying to encourage them and help them and get them to practices and the like, but I feel like I am not doing that well. I must admit a bit of regret for the basketball because its irregularity upsets my sense of planning and scheduling, but I see it's potential for good things for both my boys. I do regret that I haven't found a way to fit in piano yet...

I know I need to sit down with myself and figure this out. A few more weeks feeling like this and I am going to lose it. I am looking forward to Playworks Ink and hoping that weekend time will provide some clarity for me. I even bought a few more colours of highlighters to help me organize my day timer in case that is what I need. I am worried, because there have been a few opportunities come my way that I had to pass on because they didn't feel right, but I worry that I will stop getting offers if I keep saying no. On the one hand, I do not want to be volunteering my time for something I do not want to do 100%, but on the other hand I do not want to miss out on fabulous experiences. I wish I could just roll a die and make my choices that way...

My Life is Either at the Zoo or in a Whorehouse Right now...

And I am not talking metaphorically!

I had a planning meeting this morning with the other Camp Counsellors for the "Acting Like Animals" Camp that I will be working at this summer at the Zoo. It was fun. We had one of the counsellors from last year there and he gave great input and the girls seem fun and enthusiastic and I think we will all work together well. I am excited about this and need to get to work on the plays for the camp. I have the stories and resources, now I have to write the scripts.

I am also at a very important phase in Whorehouse rehearsals. Last night we started putting the pieces together. We have everything choreographed and blocked and last night we stumbled Act One. It was choppy, especially in between scenes, but it is all there and now I can clean it. I am a little stressed about injuries because I don't want to have anyone hurt, but we have a plan to help avoid that and still keep the integrity of the number. Speaking of the dance - it is so good. I find it hard to believe that they learned all that so recently. We have some work to do, but not as much as we could have. It was nice for everyone to see what has been done - since I work in pieces this was the first time some people saw any scenes outside the ones they are actually in. It was great to hear the laughter and applause from the cast in the house for the cast on the stage. Lovely, lovely, lovely!